How to Deal With a Conversational Narcissist

    November 27, 2013 at 4:10 am

    Conversational Narcissists seek to have one way conversations about themselves.  Always.  Here’s a guide to effectively deal with them.  As a society, we have encouraged conversational narcissism by our collectively increased use of personal pronouns as conversational modifiers to encourage conversations to shift towards ourselves. As long as we have willing audiences, which we do, the direction of 21st century conversations will increase our conversational narcissism.

    girl giving out duck face

    With the modern era, we are all narcissists.  We have facebooks, instagrams, Twitters, and we are constantly broadcasting ourselves into our smartphone universe. As a collective species, our smartphones have diminished our abilities to converse with one another in a meaningful way.  Instead, we find ourselves in an exacerbated situation where we all end up babbling to one another, usually about ourselves.

    The content of any conversation can be broken down into a support-response and a shift-response.  A support-response is something that encourages the other discussant to continue,  For instance, saying “please tell me more about how you robbed that mini-market” would be a support-response.  A shift-response is when the conversation shifts to the presenter as an object in the conversation.  Things like, “yeah, I’ve been robbing mini-markets for years, this one time bla bla bla”

    To deal with conversational narcissism, the best thing to do is confront others about their narcissistic ways.  Tell them that they spend an inordinate amount of time and energy talking about themselves and that you would rather talk about something different.  If they continue their antics, use any of these these five conversational techniques to stifle their conversations about themselves.


    stock picture of a guy looking confused

    Ask them to repeat what they said because you didn’t get it the first time. Then ask them to repeat it again. Repeat step.


    Auspicious Recoriding Device

    Secretly record them and then create musical mashups of their various uses of, “I, me, and my”


    Fist in mouth

    If you feel comfortable, place a finger over their mouth, but if not, place a finger over your mouth indicating to them that you would like them to be quiet.


    guy getting punched in the face

    you can gesture


    Pointing Gun

    or you can shoot.




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