5 Celebrities That Need Their Own Comic Strip

 
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    March 30, 2011 at 5:00 am

    Picked up a newspaper lately? Besides to line the dog cage or to cheaply wrap a gift? With the except of a couple daily reads, they are all dying a slow death (not news) and it’s easy to see the problem; anything newspapers can do online can do better. A person can post classifieds on line, advertise their business or even check when people in their life kick the bucket.

    Perhaps the most glaring proof that newsies are horribly oldsie are on the comic pages? Does anyone clamor for the latest Hagar the Horrible? Do people get upset when they can’t read the latest Kudzu? I guess the better question would be: does anyone under fifty read the comic strips?

    I’m not saying comics should be scratched all together but how about some new blood in the daily funnies. Sure there are countless comics online that are funny and biting in their satire but those are best left on the web. Instead of the Charlie Brown, Nancy and other characters that stopped being funny long ago, how about taking famous faces and giving them a daily strip?

    Here are five celebs that should have their own comics.

    Tracy Morgan

    Tracy Morgan is a sound byte machine in real life and on 30 Rock. Classic one liners that will have a person chuckling for days. It’s kind of hard to figure out if Morgan is playing Tracy Jordan or playing Tracy Morgan with a different name. This makes for the perfect comic strip scenario. Also, Morgan can be even more off the wall, because you can get away with anything in comic form. “Affirmative action was designed to keep women and minorities in competition with each other, to distract us, while white dudes inject AIDS into our chicken nuggets. That’s a metaphor!” Probably not as offensive in a whimsical black and white drawing but still just as funny.

    Gary Busey

    Busey is bonkers. He is bonkers or does an Academy Award winning job of acting in such a way that the entire world thinks he is nuts. Remember the bum rush of Jennifer Garner on the red carpet a couple years ago. Imagine a daily strip about Busey where he does that to regular people. I’m not sure if I’d be more interested in a strip about the life of Busey or more the artistic interpretation of Busey from whatever artists drew the strip. Those crazy eyes. The spastic facial ticks. He looks like a real life cartoon.

    Hugh Hefner

    Why not make a comic strip about the man that almost every other man in the world wants to be? Imagine the stories the man could tell. Half of them not even close to Rated R or perverted. The strip could be about either a young Hef in his glory days with the bunnies or his later years um…with the bunnies. Either way, the reader is guaranteed at least two pair of cartoon boobs per strip.

    Kanye West

    Love him or hate him the man leads an interesting life; drunken award show melt-downs, posting penis pics for fun and being an award winner singer, songwriter and producer all of it makes for a fun story. I think to make it even more interesting, his comic self should be a little boy. Kid Kanye, acting the way he does, in an elementary or Kindergarten type setting. “Ms. Johnson, Imma have to interrupt you for a second. Sure Timmy’s drawing was good but Suzy had the best painting ever!”

    Kathy Griffin

    It took a long time for me to warm up to Kathy Griffin. I think it was just because I didn’t really know what she was all about until I caught one of her stand-up specials. The moment I realized how most of her act revolved around making fun of celebrities and Hollywood was the moment I became a fan. Kathy would be a great replacement for the other Cathy comic, except this strip would be funny and have nothing to do with serious, serious emotional issues. Each strip could include a celebrity cameo where Griffin rips into another celebutard. “(Griffin on Renne Zellweger) “I may have said in an interview in People magazine that I thought Renee Zellweger was so thin that she looked like the lost Olsen triplet. And I may have said that she hasn’t eaten since Chicago. . . . You know what I said in my DVD? I said she looked like a sweaty puffy coke whore.” I, along with all of Hollywood, would read a comic strip with zingers like that daily.

     
     
     
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