Top 5 Ways Our World Will Change Now That Newsweek Stopped Printing
1. Can no longer peruse it in the magazine aisle when trying to impress classy dames at Wal-Mart
2. Will no longer be able to gain a meta understanding of world politics while waiting in line at the supermarket
3. Weekly World News can finally begin that hard-hitting journalism they’ve been edged out of for so many years
4. Fetishists for pictures of German Chancellor Angela Merkel will become tragically withdrawn
5. People readers are now officially the most technologically behind
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