Top 5 Things We Learned from the Presidential Debate
-

1. The economy’s probably going to need, like, another World War
2. Still no product placement, despite offers for candidates to declare their platform part of the “Pepsi Nation”
3. Neither candidate cares about our hot-button issue of funding scientific research to curing hangovers
4. Both candidates lost a huge chunk of voters who are excited about fashion
5. That old guy at the desk made a horrible heckler
Full Story, here


