Top 5 Surprising Revelations on Mitt Romney’s Tax Return
1. Deducted his wife as a business expense2. Counted all the poor people in Massachusetts as dependents
3. Stiff posture actually due to adamantine skeleton, which allowed him to write himself off as a piece of farming equipment
4. Created offshore tax shelter in Heaven
5. Filled forms out using his own blood, which allowed him to write himself off as a business expense
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