Top 5 Reasons NBC Cut off the Olympics Closing Ceremonies
1. Thought ending coverage early would avoid any more potential audience-alienating blunders
2. Mistook closing ceremonies for some big-budget British sports detective show
3. Data has shown that their viewers don’t like seeing images of foreigners
4. Fireworks were causing Bob Costas’ to have simultaneous seizures and heart palpitations
5. Had more important breaking news story:
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