Top 5 Places Russian Jets Go When They Disappear from Indonesian Radar
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1. Through a wormhole into an alternate universe with giant, talking rabbits and gaping plot holes
2. A mystical island which has dislodged from time and where J.J. Abrams never resolves the plot
3. Through a vortex to a desert in Arizona where, again, J.J. Abrams never resolves the plot
4. Into a Stephen King acid-induced nightmare where every day ends with giant balls eating the atmosphere
5. Into the age of dinosaurs, where Russian technology stopped evolving


