Would You Rather? With Comedian Jay Malone

 
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    February 1, 2011 at 11:00 am

    Joining us today for another rousing game of “Would You Rather?” is comedian Jay Malone. Jay Malone, maple syrup, Mounties, and beavers – all some of Canada‘s best exports. Malone covers a wide range of topics on his new comedy album, SOME OF MY WEAKNESSES, and beavers are just one of them. His Showtime “LOL” special is available on demand until February 22nd and his album is available now on iTunes.

    EGOTV: Would You Rather… Have your spouse catch you cheating OR catch you transferring a large sum of money out of your joint bank account?

    Jay Malone: Catch my spouse cheating. I can then spend the money I didn’t lose by going to Europe and buying another spouse.

    EGOTV: Have to walk around on five foot stilts for the rest of your life OR always have to ride a unicycle to get around?

    Jay Malone:Ride a unicycle. People on stilts are creepy and weird and can’t go into buildings.

    EGOTV: Eat five boxes of Fruity Pebbles in a day OR drink 21 cups of coffee?

    Jay Malone:Eat five boxes of Fruity Pebbles and then drink 21 cups of coffee the next day. The increased metabolism from the caffeine will burn off the Fruity Pebbles as my heart twitches like a humming bird.

    EGOTV: Always attract flocks of birds OR clouds of dust wherever you went?

    Jay Malone:Clouds of dust. I would grow a beard, wear an old desert robe and carry a staff shaped like a snake! People would call me the son of Moses and let me butt in line at Starbucks. (especially helpful on my 21 coffee day)

    EGOTV: Have your wife go on a private business trip with OJ Simpson OR Mike Tyson?

    Jay Malone:OJ Simpson. He’s too old and tired to kill like that again. Ear biting takes almost no energy at all!!

    EGOTV: Get caught having sex with your best friends mom OR catch your mom having sex with your best friend?

    Jay Malone:Catch my mom having sex with my best friend. You’d have a trump card with both of them during any argument for the rest of your life! “Eat your vegetables they’re good for you.” “As good as Shawn??”

    Jay Malone’s Showtime special “LOL” is available on demand until February 22nd and his album Some Of My Weaknesses is available now on iTunes.

     
     
     
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