10 Hysterical (and Still Relevant) Quotes From Groucho Marx

    January 28, 2011 at 5:00 am

    Every once in a while it’s necessary to go back to the classics; books, film, TV shows and of course the people that shaped the world.

    The other day I dove into a Marx Brothers mini-marathon. Still just as funny today as when they debuted over fifty years ago. Timeless one-liners, spot on delivery and the material is just as relevant today. Groucho pulled no punches and delivered punchlines about women, marriage life and the way of the world.

    I went digging to find the ten best Groucho quotes that are still just as fresh, funny and relevant in 2011.

    “A man’s only as old as the woman he feels.”

    “Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.”

    “Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.”

    “Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.”

    “Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him. “

    “Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.”

    “I remember the first time I had sex – I kept the receipt.”

    “I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.”

    “I don’t care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.”

    “I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.”

    1. Daddyoh says:

      The Guy was Genius!

    2. Argo says:

      what about “I once shot an elephant in my pajamas , how it got there I’ll never know” or “don’t leave in a huff , leave in a minute and a huff” there are so many !

    3. HemiYemi says:

      Makes a lot of sense dude.


    4. TheReviewer says:

      Harpo would think those are silly. Marx bros. rule!

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