Lindsay Lohan Gets Candy Care Packages In Rehab

    November 1, 2010 at 9:00 am

    Lindsay Lohan gets candy care packages in rehab

    Poor Lindsay. Spending all that time away from something she really loves; her sweets. You thought I was going to say drugs. In due time my friends, in due time. Read this first;

    Lindsay Lohan won’t be going door-to-door asking for treats this year — instead she’s having the candy come to her. Sources close to LiLo tell TMZ she’s been receiving care packages of candy at Betty Ford from some of her closest friends. We’re also told Dina Lohan, her sainted mother, is scheduled to visit today and plans to bring a few things to satisfy Lindsay’s sweet tooth.

    Lindsay really misses the booger sugar. Especially rubbing the last traces of powder against her gums. It’s better than Bazooka! Anyway, what kind of candy does LiLo prefer? Let’s venture some guesses. Candy necklaces because they are very whoreish. Candy cigarettes because they look cool in her mouth next to real cigarettes. Wax lips because they look like a vagina. I could go all night, like Lindsay on a bender.

    As for Halloween in Betty Ford, we’re told patients aren’t permitted to trick or treat from unit to unit and they don’t dress up — unless they just happened to pack a costume for their rehab stint.

    “Underwear. Check. Pajamas. Check. Sexy rehab patient outfit. Check. Ok, I’m all ready for rehab mom!”

    It’s not as good as Lindsay’s costume last year when she went as Herbie the “I’ll do anything for blow, and I mean anything” Suck Bug.

    Lindsay Lohan — No Tricks, Yes Treats – [TMZ]

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