As one Hollywood friend recently summed up for us: “The Aughts were the decade when TV started to matter more than film.” There’s a lot of reasons for this: the invention of the DVD box set, the advent of reality television, the general raising of quality of shows on cable. But the biggest reason might be that TV still has the power to shock and awe. For instance, just when people think they’ll never be surprised by the stupid box, out pops a sunny Jackson nipple.

Below are the five we think truly defined the decade.

#5: The Aforementioned Nipple

Thar she blows. It's a nipple, boys!

During the halftime show of Super Bowl XXXVIII on February 1st, 2004, Justin Timberlake tore off part of Janet Jackson’s costume, exposing her nipple to roughly half a billion people for half a second. Live TV broadcasts have always had the opportunity for a little craziness, but nudity wasn’t quite what anyone was suspecting. It also put the kibosh on Tom Petty’s planned halftime show, in which he was going to give the nation a peek of his Bedazzled sack.

#4 The First Season Finale of Survivor

This was nine years ago? Wow, we're feeling old.

It’s hard to imagine a time when Survivor truly captivated the nation, but during the first season in 2000, it was all anyone was talking about (well, TV-wise, that is.) What made the first season so good? Pretty much, this was before people had figured out how to win reality shows. After Richard walked away with the prize, it’s gotten a little boring because all subsequent winners have essentially aped his strategy. Which is: be a Machiavellian asshole.

#3 Britain’s Got Talent and Goddamn Susan Boyle

Ah, hell Susan, you're alright.

We say “goddamn Susan Boyle,” because she takes away everything cynical and hateful about us. Well, almost everything. We still keep a goodly amount bottled up for the lean times.

#2 David Letterman uses his show to talk about where he puts his penis

Though it's a little creepy to sleep with people you can fire, we're still with ya, Dave.

We don’t know about you, but we loved the fact that, rather than let people whisper about it, Letterman used his October 1st, 2009 show to come right out and tackle questions about a messy personal situation he was involved in. He basically said:  Yes, I had an affair with a staffer. Yes, someone tried to blackmail me. No, I don’t want to say anything else about it. What balls on that one!

#1 We Hate Ashlee Simpson With the White-Hot Intensity of a Thousand Burning Suns

The only thing stopping us from punching the computer is the fact that we don't want to hurt Jude Law, beautiful man he is and all.

This is the second time we’ve mentioned this incident in the last two weeks, but we just had to point it out again for being a truly defining moment in television. It exposed so much of what’s wrong with manufactured pop stars. Their marginal talent. Their often(alleged) shitty attitude towards fans.

Most especially, though, we hate how Ashlee Simpson handled the famous lip-syncing incident on the October 24th, 2004 edition of Saturday Night Live. This still was taken right after she blamed her backing band for her lip-syncing.

Arg!