Political sex scandals are as old as time. But as Congress returns for the fall scrum sessions over health-care, Afghanistan, and financial reform, we thought we’d take a look on the more salacious side of politics in 2009. So, without further adieu, here are the top 5 political sex scandals from this year.

5. Samuel Kent -- Federal Judge -- Galveston, TX

Kent was appointed federal district judge for Galveston Texas in 1990 by George H.W. Bush. In May, he was sentenced to 33 months in prison for obstructing justice in the investigation of sexual abuse allegations. These allegations included trying to force his  case manager into unwanted sex acts in August 2003 and March 2007, and his secretary from 2004 through at least 2005. This was the first-ever indictment of a sitting federal judge. Kent showed considerable chutzpah when, in the face of charges, he attempted to retire on disability due to depression — which would have allowed him to continue receiving his full salary… for the rest of his life. The request was denied, but hey, you can’t blame the molester for trying! Kent finally cried uncle and resigned from office only after learning he was going to be impeached.

4. Sam Adams (D-OR) -- Mayor of Portland

No, not the beer, nor the guy after which the beer was named. This Sam Adams is still the mayor of Portland, who came under fire for having an affair with an 18-year old male intern, named — if this isn’t perfect — Beau Breedlove. That’s right. Breedlove. Breedlove was a under-aged intern for Adams in 2005, and in September 2007, Adams denied rumors of a sexual relationship between them, calling the allegations ’scurrilous,’ adding that they played to stereotypes of gays being “predatorial,” but  in January 2009, Adams admitted to lying about their relationship after he was re-elected in 2008. He explained the young man initiated the relationship and that they were not sexually active until Breedlove hit 18… Boy they must’ve been really stoked about that birthday!

Adams was the first openly gay mayor of a top 30 U.S. city and has been “out” since 1993, so this scandal doesn’t quite have the scandalous quality of the upcoming “family values” sinners… but the names in this affair! Fabulous!

3. Mike Duvall (R-CA) -- Yorba Linda, CA Assemblyman

This California Assemblyman had my favorite sex scandal of the year because he accidentally ratted himself via a hot microphone  IN an appropriations committee hearing! That’s smarts for ya. Here’s the gaffe:

One of the women Duvall talks about is a lobbyist for the San Diego-based energy firm Sempra. In a (shocking!) coincidence, Duvall joined other Republicans, voting several times this year against renewable energy measures opposed by Sempra Energy which would require utilities to derive significantly more electricity from solar, wind, geothermal and other renewable energy sources by 2020. Classy!

And he mentions a second woman: “Cher, Shar, Shar — oh, she is hot. I talked to her yesterday. She goes, ‘So are we finished?’ ” Duvall says, adding that he replied no. He continues: “And I go, ‘You know about the other one, but the other one doesn’t know about you.’” Playyaaa…. This is apparently that second mistress, Heidi Barsuglia:

On the tape, Duvall describes the “little eye-patch underwear” worn by Barsuglia. This underwear should go great with Duvall’s 100% rating by the Capitol Resource Institute, a conservative, “pro-family” advocacy organization. By the way, Duvall and both of the women in question were married at the time of the affair.

2. John Ensign (R-NV) -- U.S. Senator

“I used you for my own pleasure,” Senator John Ensign said in a letter to his mistress, Cynthia Hampton, who was not only his mistress but also Treasurer of the Senator’s campaign committees, and wife of Ensign’s Senate aide, Doug Hampton.  ”It was a sin,” he confirms.  The Hamptons were close friends of the Ensigns even before they started working for the Ensign campaign.

Senator Ensign might be in some ethical trouble, however, as he paid Cynthia Hampton more than $25,000 in “severence” in May 2008, and conveniently left the 25 g’s off of his campaign books. Didn’t stop the hot Christian Conservative sinning, though, as the affair continued until August.

Ensign became a born-again Christian  in college and is the only Pentecostal in the Senate. He also resides at the influential C-Street religious house in Washington. He was a fierce critic of Bill Clinton over the Monica Lewinsky Affair, and was a staunch advocate for Clinton’s impeachment. He also advocates for banning gay marriage, citing the “sanctity of marriage” as the main reason.

1. Mark Sanford (R-SC) -- Governor of South Carolina

Ah, the epic, trans-continental Romantic Saga of 2009. Earlier this year, Sanford, Republican Governor of South Carolina, disappeared somewhere  after a tough Legislative session without telling his staff. When asked where the Governor was, they said he was “hiking the Appalachian Trail.” After the 6-day sojourn, Sanford returned to his confused staff and constituency from Buenos Aires, and admitted that he had been having an affair with 43-year-old reporter from Argentina, Maria Belen Chapur.

Interestingly, even before the governor went AWOL to make hot latin love,  TIME had ranked him in 2005 as one of the Nation’s Worst Chief Executives, because his fiscal hard-liner theatrics rarely yielded real results. In too many instances, his conservative principles thwarted the economic development of a poor Southern state that has the country’s third-highest unemployment rate and some of its most decrepit schools. Also, did you know that adultery is a crime in South Carolina? It’s punishable by a $500 fine and a year in prison. Of course, the Governor will be glad to know that this relic is never enforced, but it is still on the books. Sanford also frequents the C-Street house in DC, where apparently, a lot of Christian heavy-petting goes on.

Making the incident even more intriguing was the release of Sanford’s private emails to his Mistress, in which he muses on her  ”magnificent gentle kisses,” her “tan lines, hips and erotic beauty.” And while he acknowledges that they are in a “hopelessly impossible love,” his “heart cries out for [her]” and for “an even deeper connection to [her] soul.” A tear, everyone,  for Mark “Don Juan” Sanford.